Netflix support: From reset to meeting each other's parents

Just to prove further that Netflix customer service is great....this is a transcript of my convo with one of their support staff. Keep in mind that I have spoken to this particular support dude once before...Anyway, enjoy the read!




Netflix Trevor

Hello my name is Trevor and i'll be your Netflix expert today. Who am I speaking with ?

You

Marketa

Netflix Trevor

Hey Marketa :) It's nice to talk to you again.

Netflix Trevor

What's going on ?

You

Well, Netflix on my smarttv is not at all recognizing my new account info

Netflix Trevor

Aaa gotcha, well you came to the right person for help ! one moment while I get your account pulled up.

Netflix Trevor

Alright, can you sign into other devices with the same log in info ?

You

yeah my computer seems fine

Netflix Trevor

Okay cool, so this means that there is some backed up data going through the Netflix app on the TV. But don't worry, let's go through some steps to get this working for ya Marketa :) Could I have you unplug the TV from the power outlet for 1 min. Then press the power button on the TV before plugging it back in. This will fully discharge the TV from any stuck electrical currents.

You

ok

Netflix Trevor

Let me know if you can sign in after.

You

nope

Netflix Trevor

Alright, no problem. Could I now have you press Up, Up, Down, Down, Left, Right, Left, Right, Up, Up, Up, Up. on the TV's remote while on the sign in screen. Let me know if you get a different screen.

You

just a sec

Netflix Trevor

Take your time :)

You

so i still press sign-in on the home page right>

Netflix Trevor

No, you will need to press those buttons on the remote in that order and a second screen should pop up.

Netflix Trevor

It might take a couple times.

You

ah ok

Netflix Trevor

:)

You

nothing's happening

Netflix Trevor

Alright, no problem. There is one more way to get you signed out of the app and get rid of that backed up data. We will need to reset the TV. Don't worry, this won't harm the TV at all either. Let me grab those steps really quick.

You

ok

Netflix Trevor

Thank you for all of your patience Marketa. You having a good morning so far ?

You

well sure ! how come you're the only one working for Netflix?

You

seemingly

Netflix Trevor

LOL It's just a luck of the draw I guess. I have only had a few people that I have talked to more than once :)

You

ok i thought the whole enterprise was run by you and your pet cat named Theodor

You

anyway - carry on

Netflix Trevor

LOL Theodor is pretty skilled, but not very friendly :)

Netflix Trevor

Thank you.

Netflix Trevor

Alright, here are the steps to reset the TV. Let me know if you have any questions on them.

Netflix Trevor

Press the Home button on your remote. Select Setup. Select TV Settings. Select General. Select Reinstall TV.

You

hmm i have no tv settings

You

i see picture, sound, features, installation, software

Netflix Trevor

Interesting... And you are out of the Netlfix app in the TV's main menu ?

You

yeah

Netflix Trevor

Okay one moment.

You

would restoring default settings do the trick?

Netflix Trevor

Yes that is what we're looking for :)

You

no man, this isn't happening at all. it wants a pin from me that i never actually set

You

oy vey

Netflix Trevor

Try 0000

Netflix Trevor

It's usually the default password.

You

ah winner!

Netflix Trevor

SWEETT !! haha

You

now everything is dark and the tv's off...

Netflix Trevor

Ya it will restart itself during the reset.

You

what have we done?? this tv was my only friend.

Netflix Trevor

LOL don't worry it will come back up :) If not, then let's go ahead and press the power button to bring it back up.

You

ok so it's been quiet for a while now...turn it on?

Netflix Trevor

Yes

Netflix Trevor

It should have you set it back up after it comes on.

You

despite how i come across i'm not actually 89 and usually grasp technology

Netflix Trevor

OH I know the feeling all to well Marketa :)

You

ok it's just looking for channels and such

Netflix Trevor

Okay no problem at all, I'm a pretty patient guy haha.

You

unlike theodor

You

do you get to watch netflix at work as part of training?

Netflix Trevor

Ya, he would be pretty rude lol No unfortunately not :/ But I love the job so I guess I am fine with not watching at work lol

You

oh well, i guess you and your coworkers can at least re-enact your favourite scenes for one another

Netflix Trevor

Ya we have a lot of fun at work haha We are laughing constantly and cracking jokes. it makes the day a lot better.

You

oh that's nice :) it sounds like a magical land

You

(ps. still looking for channels...)

Netflix Trevor

Ya kind of like stumbling into Narnia :) Oh gotcha, no worries. You were in the main smart TV's settings right ?

You

yep...so resetting everything that my tv knew about me.

You

like language and where it's sittign and all that jazz

Netflix Trevor

Oh gotcha, if you want to set that back up, I would be more than happy to wait with you :) Is it still going through channels ?

You

yes it is...apparently i'm baller and have many channels

Netflix Trevor

Ya I was just thinking that !! You must be pretty popular haha What do you usually do for fun in Canada ? Isn't it pretty cold all year round ? I don't know much about it.

You

clearly! it's actually 12 degrees right now...Celsius that is.

You

not sure what that is in your made-up temperature degrees

You

i'm just heading off to a Xmas market actually to sell my pottery

Netflix Trevor

LOL I am not sure. Oh you make pottery ? It get's pretty cold here too during the winter.

You

where are you?

Netflix Trevor

I am in Utah, in the US. Great snowboarding powder though :)

You

see? you know what winter's all about. everyone's just imagining all of Canada to be a frozen tundra. But it ain't.

Netflix Trevor

I just looked at some pictures :) It looks beautiful ! What part are you in ?

You

Ottawa

You

it's pretty

Netflix Trevor

Looking at a couple pictures :)

Netflix Trevor

Are there a lot of castles there ?

You

hahah

You

yes i live in the biggest one

You

right beside our hunky new Prime Minister

Netflix Trevor

THATS AWESOME !!! Yes I am a little gulible haha I have always wanted to tour around in a well known castle.

Netflix Trevor

Oooh do you go borrow sugar from him every now and again ?

You

he doesn't eat sugar. he's naturally sweet ;)

You

bahaha

Netflix Trevor

LOL I think someone has a crush ?

You

well have you SEEN him?

You

i mean no offense, but compare him to your Trump...and well...you'll want to move here ;)

Netflix Trevor

Ya I just looked at a picture of him haha I don't swing that way, but he's not a bad looking guy. Ya I am not sure what's going on with that, but I might have to move over that way after all of this.

Netflix Trevor

How's that TV coming ? any progress haha ?

You

OMG I think it worked!! huzzah!

You

well, Trevor I feel like after this chat I just need to introduce you to my parents.

Netflix Trevor

Oh professor farnsworth lol LOL Name the time and place and i'm there :)

You

hahah

Netflix Trevor

So it let you sign in and everything ? The anticipation is killing me !

You

yes I did. I know I kept you on the edge of your seat...but it's over. We won.

Netflix Trevor

The war against the machines is over !!! Now to go out and celebrate lol I am so happy you can get back to watching some good ol shows :) Was there anything else I can help out with today Marketa ?

You

No sir. I am good. The only thing you can do to help yourself is visit Ottawa.

Netflix Trevor

Ya it's on my list now ! I actually just made a memo of it :) Maybe we will bump into eachother haha. Alright, well I really hope you have a great day and a great weekend ! Thank you for the convo, it's nice to talk to someone every once in a while haha. See ya Marketa. And one more thing, if you wouldn't mind, please stay online for a one question survey.

How to be basic: a guide to yoga

Yoga. It’s one of those things that us white folk just adopted as one of our own and pretend like it was our culture all along. I can’t really think of another example from history of this, but it will come to me. Yoga brings forth images of tight pants, wrist infinity tattoos and water bottles that are actually just mason jars, because bringing along glassware with an awkward lid just seems downright practical, rather than inner peace.

But, I won’t lie. I too tried to welcome yoga into my life. And I mean more than just the occasional downward dog on the Hill. (You see, I got the lingo down.)
My voyage into the land of Namaste started with a class that was basically a feel-good afternoon, where you lay still as someone tells you that you are awesome and really should just keep being awesome. I agreed. So I came back every week. Then, however, the class was extended to an hour and half. And let’s face it: I got things to do. I can’t be zenning out for 90 minutes at a time. Just give me my emotional high-five and let’s move on.

So then came Tantric Yoga. “Ooh, you vixen, you!” you might be thinking. “What sexy time that must have been,” you might ponder with a mason jar of kombucha in your hand. You are mistaken. Images of said three-hour exercise in awkwardness still haunt my dreams. They promised us we would find our soulmates there. They promised! Yet, my soul never felt darker or lonelier afterwards. The man who looked like a 1920s strongman left little doubt in my mind why he was still looking for love. And so, after three hours of giving strangers back rubs and feeding each other bananas, I went home.

Yet, even that didn’t deter me from yoga; though it did deter me from bananas for a while. And so came time for Acroyoga. This here is a magical thing that turns you into a circus performer in an instant, if you are ok with diving headfirst into a stranger’s crotch. And for a while, I was. I sat atop strangers’ feet, I dove into crotches and I balanced others. But every good thing must come to an end.

For me, it was time for Hot Yoga. Ahh, sweating profusely in the company of others – nothing gets my motor revving more than that. You develop sweat spots in places you didn’t know could sweat and soon abandon all hope of ever feeling desirable again. I longed for the 1920s strongman. I wanted to feel pretty.

But last week, I found the right yoga for me. This was Aerial Yoga. At last, I felt, I found my calling. No more holding downward dog poses that others make look like sleek triangles, while I resembled an old woman with a hump. Tree poses that make me question whether I would ever pass the drunk balance test sober shall be no more. No more! The hammock does it all for you. Nestled in the sweet, sweet cocoon of a hammock, you are free to pretend you did something good for your health. Next time, I’m bringing a Corona.  

The Polite Baby and the Rebel youth

Public transit is like a party, for which no one was in charge of curbing the guest list.

“Gary, why is your accountant here? Did you invite her?”
“No man, did you invite the homeless man?”
“Why is there a clown riding a llama?”

Literally, anyone can and will show up. Sometimes, these are just belligerent old men who loudly proclaim the demise of society as damn women started to get education.

Sometimes, it’s a rebellious youth who didn’t consider nasal needs when getting his awkwardly placed piercing and thus sits there sniffling, just trying to free that trapped booger that’s hanging onto his piercing.

He’s probably thinking: “Damnit, I won’t let my parents get the better of me. Sure, it’s uncomfortable and sure the sniffles have cost me many a romantic possibility, but goddamnit, I’m keeping these!” And he sniffles.

But sometimes, babies load up.

There were two of these passengers today. Now, not being a mother myself, I can’t really give an age estimate on these two babes. All I can pretty well guarantee is that they were out of the womb but not yet in college. If pressed, I would guess less than a year.

One was a thug life show-off baby. The other was a polite baby.

At first, the interaction between these two was limited as neither had noticed the other across the aisle. And so we sat there and watched.

The polite baby, free of her pesky gloves, stretched out her fingers and with gratitude, she smiled at her mom who had liberated her from the entrapment of her pink gloves.

The show-off baby started reaching into the cup holders for stale Cheerios and humblebragging to the whole bus. His speech was limited to undecipherable baby noises, so allow me to translate.

“Yo, look at all these Cheerios I could have if I wanted to. But I won’t. I can just toss this one into the aisle, because I will get more.”

Polite baby smiles.

Show-off baby starts belligerently babbling on and bragging, presumably, about his cool shoes that had dogs on them. I would brag too, truthfully, had I had shoes like that.

At this point, the two babies locked eyes. It was on.

Show-off baby leaned back all casual-like in his stroller. He ain’t got to impress nobody.

Polite baby shot out enormous snot out of her delicate nose.

The bus audience froze with faces of horror.

We watched in silence as the snot hang on her porcelain face, threatening to continue its journey elsewhere.

The mom reacted quickly and cleaned her off. We all breathed a sigh of relief. Crisis averted.

Polite baby turned around and audibly thanked her mom. She knew what could’ve happened.

As the bus pulled into the stop, both babies had to get off. You know, baby stuff to do.

Polite baby waved at everyone, gently cooing “bye” as she was wheeled off the bus.

The show-off baby continued to babble loudly, probably still bragging about Cheerios he can soon consume.

Squirrels: Thug Life

Squirrels. In most parts of the world, these are adorable petite creatures, whose bushy tails complete idyllic folkloric paintings. Not so in Ontario. Here, we have thugged out black squirrels who could probably take you out quite easily.

Recently, I had two unpleasant encounters with these bushy-tailed gangsters and both had left me feeling like a black bear encounter would've been preferable.
So first, there's this black squirrel who has claimed my balcony as his lair. In my mind, his name is Slasher.

Artistic rendition of what I think Slasher looks like when I'm absent.

Slasher dominates my balcony and goes on destruction sprees from time to time.
As if to start a turf war with me, Slasher pushes planters around, knocks over plants and digs out my flowers. After he's done with my balcony, he probably goes on to kick a puppy. That's the kind of asshole this squirrel is.

The other day, I was feeling extra brave and decided to sit on my balcony. Without any fear that fables tell us these cute fuzz balls should have, my scraggly thug of a squirrel hopped right beside me and was staring me down. This was it. Slasher was moving around my balcony with the confidence of a school bully. Any minute, I thought, he's going to break another planter and shank me with the shard and end this.

But no. He came merely to intimidate me. But I stood my ground.

But this didn't seem to satiate Slasher's appetite for fear and intimidation. Looks like the ruffian had connections downtown.

A few days after my stand-off, I was minding my own business on an otherwise picturesque café patio. I could tell there was a sniper squirrel tracking my moves from above. Suddenly, it leapt. Without so much as a warning, it crawled under my seat and grabbed my leg.

I shook it off to shocked looks of bystanders who took me for an animal abuser.

Damn you, Slasher.
Now it's on.

#TreatYoSelf birthday

Birthday is the one day of the year when people celebrate you for something you had absolutely nothing to do with. It's great. There you are and all you had to do was be born. Just imagine if you were walking down the street and someone congratulated you on sunshine. It'd be great.

And what's an extra little bonus to all the love you get from family and friends?( if you have friends, that is. If you don't, then this blog will do you double duty because you have many opportunities to eat your emotions - keep reading, champ!) Free stuff.

As you may know, a number of companies offer fun birthday deals. But I don't know about you, but I never really paid much attention to it. I always just looked on in jealousy and self-pity when others were sang to by someone dressed as a moose and presented with a free cupcake on THEIR birthday. But not this year. I took the day to wander and really get my deals on. The Queen I suppose gets two freebie days. Oh, Liz, you clever minx. Is one free Frappuccino not enough for you?? I digress.

Keep in mind, these deals are specific to Ottawa, so don't go shaking your head in sadness if you live in Zealandia, SK. I can't help you. In any way. Treat yourself to a postcard of the Rockies, I guess. Anyway, here are the deals I did:

1. Get yer hair did. During the month of your birthday, you get $20 off at Salon Rouge. Bam, now you got yourself a sweet new 'do. Not to mention, you get fancy-pants coffee drinks there like a king.

So, ok, you now have Fabio hair. Let's just say you got your hair did the day before your birthday. So in your mind just watch the night turn into day in a poetic fashion.

2. Now start the day right. Go to Denny's for your well-deserved Original Grand Slam.

3. In true birthday fashion, I considered doing the rest of the day in my birthday suit. But the closest I could get to this legally was going to a free hot yoga class at Yogatown. Work off that bacon.

4. Your steps then must naturally take you to Sephora. After all, you just did somethin' somethin' for your health, surely a little beauty treat is in order. Do it. You get a sweet birthday gift. Boys, you can probably get some manly cosmetics too, or else you can finally get that perfect shade of red for your moonlighting career as a boyesque performer. It's a thing. Go Bing that shit.

5. Ok. Now it's time to cash in on your Starbucks love. You've been buying tall brewed coffees for months so you can finally roll into the store and with the boisterousness of a drunken uncle at a wedding, yell out: "Make me the creamiest, sweetest, biggest beverage you can, barista! Don't be cheap on the whipped cream and if it comes in anything other than a trough, try again." Huzzah!

6. If you'd like to shake off the fat before heading over to your next free feast, you animal, you can partake in another free yoga class, offered by Elevate Yoga.

7. Now, you're ready to take on the feast of all feasts. Put on your stretchy pants, put on your game face and head over to the buffet at Tucker's Marketplace. Just do it. If you start feeling full, don't give up. Go for a jog around the food stations and get back to it, tiger. This is your time to shine.

If you really want to squeeze in one more tasty beverage, Booster Juice has you covered with one regular bevvie.

And there you have your free day. Now it's time to  finally look yourself in the mirror and ponder the depths of getting older. Until next year, giant tubs of Starbucks and never-ending plates of food. Until next year. #Treatyoself